Powerful Language We Use

The language we use either creates or limits the options we believe we have for achieving what we want in life.

Why? Because our language directly reflects our beliefs and values, our beliefs ultimately create our reality.

You may have heard the common Henry Ford quote:

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can't – you're right.”

Essentially, this quote highlights that we will act by our beliefs. For example, if we believe that with perseverance, we could achieve our fitness goal, then it’s likely we will do the actions required to get there; conversely, if we believe we can’t achieve our fitness goal, then it’s possible we won’t do the steps necessary to achieve the goal.

The language we hear ourselves thinking or saying aloud is extremely useful in building our self-awareness around what we believe and the ‘rules’ we live by. The words we use either support or hinder us from being who we want to be, act and achieve our goals.

Certain words indicate our beliefs and the number of options we think we have. In Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), they are called Modal Operators, which means modes of operating.

Two types are Modal Operators of Necessity and Modal Operators of Possibility. Neither modal operator is ‘better’; they are just specific words that reflect different beliefs and rules we’ve developed to operate by. We can use these types of words to our advantage. Let’s explain each.

Modal Operators of Necessity:

This relates to words that suggest you do something because you feel you must and have no choice. They are words that require certain responses and actions connected with abilities or lack thereof.

Examples include: should, must, have to, need, and ought to.

Modal Operators of Necessity can lead to create stressful states that are self-imposed and can lead to resistance. Alternatively, they can motivate us to complete deadlines and help us achieve important goals. The tone used plays a big part in the impact of these words.

Modal Operators of Possibility:

This relates to words that denote that which is considered possible. They are certain words that suggest you do something because you feel you want to and have choices.

Examples include: could, able to, can, try, will, get to, and may.

How to use modal operators of necessity and possibility to your advantage

When we are aware of the power of our language, we can use our language to our advantage to encourage taking action and achieving what we want. If we want to put urgency and timeframes around action, then words of necessity can drive us to act.

If we want to feel freedom in many options and be able to pick an option, then using words of possibility can create this.

When we become aware that we are using modal operators of necessity – words like ‘have to’ and ‘must’, but it is having a result of leading to resistance, then changing our language to a comment like ‘can’ and ‘could’ can remove resistance and create options for a different way of feeling about and tackling the scenario.

Take these two examples:

I ‘have to’ go to the gym.

Vs

I ‘could’ go to the gym.

In this example, ‘have to’ creates no choice, whereas ‘could’ creates choice and freedom that you choose it rather than there being no options involved.

Generally speaking, words of possibility can encourage us to think outside the box and generate more ideas for achieving our goals and is definitely worth including in your everyday language and when problem-solving.

If you want to create more options for yourselves and remove the resistance you are facing, explore using the language of possibility to make more choices.

If you want support exploring your beliefs and language to support the achievement of your goals, contact Leaders Network at www.leadersnetworkgroup.com.au